Season 4 Round-up & A Leader's Spirituality

EPISODE 53 | SEASON 4 ROUND-UP & A LEADER'S SPIRITUALITY

That's often the approach that I take – I want to help you connect with the experience of what it's like to be struggling when you're living an inauthentic life. And then the experience of what it's like to begin to connect to your true self. What are the steps that you may need to take? What are some principles, right – that would work for you to begin to have a hold on how to start this journey.

[00:00:27] INTRODUCTION
Welcome to Becoming Me, your podcast companion and coach in your journey to a more integrated and authentic self. I am your host, Ann Yeong, and I'm here to help you grow in self-discovery and wholeness. If you long to live a more authentic and integrated life and would like to hear honest insights about the rewards and challenges of this journey, then take a deep breath, relax, and listen on to Becoming Me.

[00:00:59] SEASON 4 RECAP
Hello again, dear listeners. Now, this is actually the final episode of season four on the Becoming Me podcast. Thank you so much for having stayed with me through the last, well, 52 episodes – for those of you who have been listening from the beginning. Now, if you're someone who has just recently stumbled upon this podcast and you haven't heard my earlier episodes – you know, maybe just jumped in the last 10 episodes or so.

[00:01:33]
And listened to what I was talking about – about inner child healing, my conversation with Dr. Jean Cheng. Maybe this would be helpful for you to know – and that is that this podcast, each season builds on the past seasons. You don't have to begin from the very beginning if you're just checking out the podcast. But this whole theme – I mean the entire theme of the Becoming Me podcast – about growing in authenticity and wholeness; it's something that is really big, right?

[00:02:08] PAST SEASONS RECAP
It's really dense. And it brings us, you know, into great depths, really – if you really want to not just think about it but be able to try and practice it. So, the way that this podcast has been developing is, you know, the first season was really laying some very foundational principles that I need you to understand which I frequently refer to in subsequent episodes.

[00:02:35]
Things like, for example, living from the inside out, the three layers of life. You know, the difference between being grounded in our core identity; knowing who we are at our core versus just trying to perform on the surface layer of our lives. Right, and in season two, we went a little deeper.

[00:02:57]
I talk a bit generally, you know, but – generally, but also specifically – whenever I give specific examples in my own journey about how this pilgrimage, you know – this interior pilgrimage can sometimes challenge us and how it's okay when maybe we have doubts or when we feel like we are actually going backwards. Sometimes moving forwards in this interior journey can feel like we're going backwards. In season three, I wanted to introduce the idea that we are all different.

[00:03:32]
Every one of us are unique. So, that means that, while there are some general principles to making this interior journey into authenticity and greater wholeness, everyone will make it slightly differently. And we also need to honour that difference, both in our design, our motivation, and actually also in the way that we are wounded in our personal histories.

[00:03:57] THE CURRENT SEASON (SEASON 4)
Now, that was really just an introduction though, about, you know – that it's important to bear in mind that we're all unique in the way that we're going to make this journey. And then we went to season four, where I dealt with the theme of healing. Okay, and the reason why season four was about healing was, I realized as we were talking about making this journey and about how we're designed differently – that unless we begin to actually grow a bit more in wholeness, the foundation, the core of us, that's often very insecure.

[00:04:36]
And, you know, I talked about shame. I talk about all that sense of never being good enough, feeling not being good enough. And all those scripts that we compulsively live out of to try and fulfil expectations about who we're supposed to be. Well, all that comes because – they come about because our core identity is fractured, right –

[00:04:57]
– and wounded, and we're not secure about who we are. We don't even really know who we are. And we can be so out of touch with ourselves that some of us can succeed for very long living out of a persona. And over time, feel like we are a fraud. Like maybe we're an imposter. Maybe we're getting out of touch with who we actually are.

[00:05:22]
And the anxiety will grow inside us – you know, that other people don't really know who I really am. I don't know if they will actually accept me if they really know who I really am. And then this fear that maybe I cannot accept myself if I really know who I really am. So, this whole journey about becoming more ourselves, our true selves – is coming to that place where we can become more confident about who we are and who we are not.

[00:05:57]
That we can accept that person and love that person regardless of how other people may treat us – whether they are happy or disappointed about who we are. And to be able to grow in that capacity to be able to accept ourselves. To be able to get to know ourselves, get reacquainted with who we really are.

[00:06:22]
That was what season four was actually about because we can't grow in that capacity to know and accept and love ourselves unless we talk about some inner healing. And inner child healing is not the only modality or the only way to go about it. But it was one very powerful method that helped me. And from the responses that I've been getting from many of you, it seems like this whole theme of inner child healing really resonated with a lot of you.

[00:06:52]
And many of you wanted to find out more about it. So, I hope that, you know, the resources that has been shared in these episodes, in season four, as well as the episodes where I go a little deeper into how inner child healing made an impact in my life, in my relationship with myself, with God, with others – how it helped me grow in security that, you know – that these episodes maybe made things a little bit more real for you.

[00:07:20]
Right, but for you to actually really do that work, you're going to have to read more on your own and, you know, potentially, ideally engage maybe a spiritual director or a therapist who knows how to facilitate inner child work for you. You know, that really would make a big difference, if you feel that that's what you need in your journey now.

[00:07:44]
So, now we're at the end of this arc in season four. After this episode, I'll be taking a break from posting new episodes. I need some time to also ponder and think about, you know, what's the next step and what's the next season going to be about. I have a sense of what it will be about, but I'm still sitting on it and pondering.

[00:08:11]
And this whole process is really just one long ongoing process of discernment for myself. You know, I'm always listening – listening in prayer and to the data that I get from your responses as well. So, season five will hopefully start in August. Right now, I hope that the break will be about a month, you know – about a month long and maybe in the third week of August, that will be when the next episode or the first episode of season five will drop.

[00:08:45]
Now, before I say, you know, goodbye for now, or before I take this break, I want to share with you another opportunity for you to connect with me, apart from on this podcast. So, my – how should I put this – my ministry, right, this whole thing about helping people understand more deeply what it's like to become more themselves, the experience of it.

[00:09:16] A LEADER'S SPIRITUALITY
I guess that's often the approach that I take. I want to help you connect with the experience of what it's like to be struggling when you're living and inauthentic life. And then the experience of what it's like to begin to connect to your true self. What are the steps that you may need to take?

[00:09:35]
What are some principles, right – that would work for you to begin to have a hold on how to start this journey. So, the podcast is a wonderful first step because it is, you know, I'm just sharing stories and information – it's to help you connect with your own experiences and then begin to connect with resources.

[00:09:56]
Now, if you want to go one step deeper with me – I mean, it doesn't have to be with me – but with me, the next thing that I do – if you want to have something interactive with me – would be a course that I teach online. And that course actually will be running in September to October this year. Currently, it's the only course that I'm teaching.

[00:10:18]
It's called A Leader Spirituality (ALS). And it is being offered through the Catholic Leadership Centre in Singapore. Now, this may interest you specifically, if you identify as Christian or Catholic, and you're an aspiring disciple of Christ and you want to know how to live that discipleship in reality, especially in the context where you are a leader.

[00:10:44] WHO IS ALS FOR?
Okay, what do I mean by a leader? There are many contexts in which you are a leader, and you have influence. So, if you are a parent, for example, you are a leader, right – because you are a leading your children. You could be a leader in the context of your job. Maybe you have a team that you're leading. You know even if you just have a couple of people that you're mentoring, for example, and you're working closely with, and they look up to you – you are in some position of influence that would be a leader as well.

[00:11:16]
And of course, you could be maybe a cell group leader, a community leader, or a ministry leader. Or you could be training to be a priest or religious, you're going to be teaching. In any context where you might see yourself as having influence and having some kind of authority over someone else – that is what I mean by leader, right.

[00:11:41]
So, how do we exercise leadership in a way that comes from our true self? That's always been a question that I've wrestled with. Because in my own story – and you would be familiar with this if you've listened to a lot of the earlier episodes – I learned the hard way that a lot of my good intentions, my zeal, was coming from a place of love, yes.

[00:12:09]
I loved much, but I didn't know how to love well because I was not able to be anchored in, you know, a self – a core identity that was secure in who I am in Christ. So, that has a huge impact on the way I lead. It has a huge opinion on the way anyone would lead.

[00:12:33]
So, we can take as many courses and read as many books about what it means to, you know, lead like a disciple or, you know, what it means to lead like Christ, like Jesus. But all that would be theoretical knowledge and we wouldn't be able to actually live it in our lives if we don't connect it to praxis.

[00:12:52]
Right, so, my area of interest is always in how do we make that connection between theoretical knowledge and actual practice. How do we meet ourselves where we are, and then begin to make that journey to towards greater integration, greater authenticity as a Christian leader. And that also means as a leader who grows in relationship with Christ, as well as becoming more spiritually fruitful.

[00:13:21]
Okay, so, the focus of this course, A Leader's Spirituality, is about the interior life of a disciple leader. And it's entirely online and it takes place over – well, the live sessions take place over four Saturdays. They are spaced every two weeks apart. And it's spaced every two weeks apart because I think we all need time to digest.

[00:13:46]
We have a lot of things going on in our lives and these topics that we talk about, that we'll be talking about, you know – similar to the kind of things that you hear bit on Becoming Me – to really ponder on them and to internalize them and to also do some of the exercises that I will offer as part of the course and worksheets.

[00:14:07]
You know, I don't want to rush you. I don't want to rush my participants. Right, so, it's once every two weeks. And there are four Saturdays where there are sessions. I will be parking the course description in the show notes for this episode. Okay, so, don't worry about that. I will refer you later, to where you can find out more about details of the course.

[00:14:28]
And I just want to add also that all the recordings of the course will be uploaded to my platform. So, there is actually a digital library on my website, integroformation.com. And if you register for the course, you'll have access to the recordings, and you will also have access to places where you can actually submit your questions.

[00:14:49]
So, even if you are not able to attend the live sessions and you want to be able to have your questions answered, you can do that, right – as part of this course. So, I really encourage you, especially if there is some real issue or area in leadership that you're struggling with right now, to consider registering for this course. Because I think a big highlight for me, about this course, are the questions that people ask.

[00:15:19]
You know – real nitty gritty questions. And those questions bring us down from, you know, the clouds of just theory and concept into real life and what it's like – what does the reality look like when we try to live what we believe and what are the things that maybe we don't usually think of considering. And also, we take a look at how maybe our assumptions and our images of God shape the way we try and lead.

[00:15:45] ABOUT THE ALS SESSIONS
Okay, the four sessions in this course actually address four interconnected dimensions of discipleship and leadership. The first session will look at the necessity of an interior life and what that is – how it takes time to develop that and how it empowers us to live out, you know, the eternal truths that Christians believe in, in this temporal life – okay, and in this world; in our leadership.

[00:16:11]
In the second session, we go deeper into looking at the three layers of life. So, that's living from the inside out – if you're familiar with episodes four and five. But I go very systematically and a lot more in depth about what that is. And I facilitate people in exploring their three layers of life –

[00:16:31]
– you know, considering some very practical situation that maybe they are struggling over at this point in their life. And in the third session, we will be looking through the layers of life, right. And looking at how, when we lack integration, we are often motivated by being relevant as a leader or being popular as a leader or having power and control as a leader.

[00:17:00]
Right, and we look at how these temptations attack our wounded core identity. So, when we act reflexively out of the place in ourselves that is ashamed and insecure, we often become leaders that – well, that are not very life giving, right – I say that with a lot of empathy and compassion. That's what we'll be looking at.

[00:17:22]
And this third session has proven, I think, over the last two runs of this course, to kind of be like the highlight and the climax of the course. And then the last and final session, you know, which really is in the end of the journey. But I try to show how ultimately for us to grow in confidence and integration and authenticity, right – in authenticity, as leaders – that would include us discovering our own unique gifts and temperament, and our own life stories, you know?

[00:17:55]
So, it's, that's Becoming Me, right? – What I talk about in Becoming Me. But how can we see all that come together and help us progressively discern, you know, who is this me that is learning to live and love and is being called to lead. And the more I know myself – who I am in Christ, the more I can accept – the better I know how I'm designed uniquely and different from other people, the more I will be able to come into how I am particularly effective in being a leader.

[00:18:29]
And it may not look like what somebody else does, you know? There could be another leader that I really admire and he, or she may lead really well, but I can't be that leader because I'm not that person. What would it mean to begin to make this journey into Becoming Me, knowing that it would also lead me to become a better, a truer, more authentic and more spiritually fruitful leader.

[00:18:54]
Right, so, if you are interested in this course, and you're a resident in Singapore, you can register for that course on the Catholic Leadership Centre website. The payment method that is used for registration is PayNow – it's is a payment method that's only available to you if you have a bank account in Singapore.

[00:19:15]
But if you don't live in Singapore and you're also interested in registering for this course, I really – I would love to have you join us. That's also possible. And registration can be done through my website. And it's a journey. So, this is actually a pilgrimage.

[00:19:32]
It's a journey and I will be the guide for these six weeks – if you want to join me. So, don't forget to check out the links in the show notes so that you can find out more about A Leader's Spirituality. Okay, so, that's it for now. Take care and have a good July! And I hope to be back in your ears in August.

[00:20:03] CONCLUSION
Thank you for listening to Becoming Me, where new episodes drop every first and third Wednesdays of the month. Remember, the most important thing about making this journey is to keep taking steps in the right direction. No matter how small those steps might be, and no matter where you might be in your life right now, it is always possible to begin. 

The world would be a poorer place without you becoming more fully alive. Don't forget to visit my website at becomingmepodcast.com and to subscribe to my newsletter as well as to this podcast. Until the next episode, Happy becoming!