Videos

Part of the journey of complex trauma recovery is interrogating assumptions that we had accepted uncritically in the past because now we can see injustice and harm which we had not before.

In this episode, I delve into the challenging and often misunderstood topic of deconstruction, especially for those of us healing from complex trauma as persons of faith. I share my own journey and how deconstruction has been an essential part of my healing process. We'll define what deconstruction means in…

Healing from complex trauma isn’t a linear journey — setbacks happen. Sometimes it feels like I’ve regressed, but I’m reminding myself that it’s actually a normal part of the process. That it also means I’m growing more attuned to my pain and the things that trigger me. That I’m able…

What Happens when Setbacks Happen? In this episode, I open up about the challenges of experiencing setbacks in the healing journey. I share a recent personal experience that triggered a significant emotional response and discuss the importance of recognizing and managing these setbacks. By acknowledging the dynamics of our internal…

A message for those of you feeling this right now!

The Painful Realization: Faith Practices Alone Cannot Heal Our Deep Wounds In this episode, I share a deeply personal story about the painful moment when I realized that having faith and spiritual practices alone couldn't save me from the dysfunctional patterns in my life. I discuss the inadvertent impact of…

@annchats

Learning about spiritual abuse is an important part of accountability and responsibility as leaders, whether we are parents, ministry leaders, spiritual directors, catechists etc.

Understanding Spiritual Abuse: A Time-Sensitive Resource In this video, I briefly discuss the importance of understanding spiritual abuse, particularly if you're on a healing journey from trauma and its effects on your relationship with God. I emphasise how spiritual abuse can distort our view of God and create obstacles in…

The fullness of our relationship with God cannot happen apart from our relationship with others and with ourselves. While we can distinguish between our relationship with God, others, and ourselves, these connections are deeply intertwined. Complex trauma affects all of them. It impacts our connection with God, our relationship with…

I've learned so much about love and attunement through my experiences with my dog. Every moment of truly connecting with her reveals something new—something that heals my nervous system and brings me closer to understanding God's love. When I attune to her, when I give and receive love without conditions,…

God transcends us—He's beyond us—but He's also incredibly immanent and present within us. When God draws close to us, how does He connect with us except through the very person, the very body, the very being He has given us? He speaks to us not only through our thoughts but…

God is saying to me—and to you: “Do you know that I love you completely and perfectly right now? Not some future, more polished, more perfect version of you, but you, exactly as you are at this moment. With all your flaws, doubts, and whatever stories you tell yourself—I love…

How Does God Heal Complex Trauma? In this episode of the Becoming Me podcast, I delve into an intriguing question posed by one of my listeners: Can healing of complex trauma happen through a personal encounter with God where He reveals His true nature to us? Building on a previous…

For those of us who have experienced trauma, the idea of spiritual freedom can feel out of reach. So many basic aspects of our humanity—like owning and exercising our freedom—were never fully developed. We were often too afraid to choose freely, fearing our choices would upset others and lead to…

For so long, I didn’t trust my own desires. I was constantly asking God, “Is this what You want me to want? Is this right?” It caused so much anxiety and guilt because I feared my desires didn’t align with His will. But as I heal, I’ve discovered something amazing:…

I realised something profound: I’ve struggled to sense God’s love, not because He’s distant, but because I believed He had to love me, as if it were an obligation. I thought I knew Him, that my relationship with God was solid—especially after some powerful conversion experiences in my relationship with…

Discernment isn’t about feeling pressured or coerced into figuring out exactly what God wants. It’s not about making the "perfect" or "holiest" choice out of fear or perfectionism. True discernment happens in a relationship of mutual love and freedom—between God and us. When we feel the weight of compulsion to…

When we carry unhealed trauma, it can feel like our nervous system is constantly in an agitated, hyper-vigilant, and stressed state. This makes it harder to fully act with clarity or purpose because our brain shifts into survival mode. In this state, fear can dominate our discernment process and we…

More important than our ability to say "yes" to everything we feel God asks of us is our ability to feel safe in His love, safe enough to give our genuine, authentic answer. It's okay to say, "Lord, if this is what You're asking, I’m not ready. I can’t do…

One of the simplest yet most powerful things we can do in our spiritual journey is to ask God to help us experience His love. It’s easy to forget, but Jesus promised — ask and you shall receive. You don’t need the perfect words or elaborate prayers, just a humble…

Our bodies are a divine gift, intricately designed to connect us with the world—and with God. Yet, many of us have grown distant from this truth. We've learned to distrust our senses, believing pleasure to be something undeserved or even wrong. But here's the reality: God created our bodies and…

We often think we've fully experienced God's love, but have we truly embraced His unconditional love? There's a profound difference. I used to believe that understanding God's love meant I knew everything about it — until I learned to fully receive His love without conditions. But here’s the challenge: Many…